Happy 1st Birthday to my beautiful baby girl!! Nyla Breeze, you are the joy of my life. You have the most adorable little personality that I just could not live without. What a beautiful little girl you have become! I am so proud to say that I am your Mommy.

Nyla, before you came into this world you have no idea what a crazy journey it was…. But well worth it!!

I have yet to document my labor story and I finally did this week. It is still fresh in my head. This is pretty long, but yes that is labor. A very long process. This is basically for my documentation to have my labor story somewhere that I can look back and read through the memory. Also for those that did ask how my labor went way back and I never got around to writing about how the crazy experience went. So here it is….

I remember one year ago on Sunday June 7th 2009 me and Josh went to a Portland Beavers game. I had 11 days to go till my due date. I was extremely pregnant and enjoying some yummy chicken strips while we watched the game. I was normally really good at eating healthy during the pregnancy. I ate tons of Spinach salads from Pastini, tons of watermelon, and tons of strawberries. I didn’t want to let myself go. The baby only needed an extra 300 calories so I knew that I should still eat healthy. That game was the start of everything. It was our last outing before our baby came. That night I started getting contractions. I was up all night coping through them. They weren’t too bad yet but definitely kept me up. I got to sleep during the day when they would stop. Again Monday night I had contractions again. I knew something was coming since they were consistently coming each night now. Monday nights were getting worse. They would always start around 12am and last till 9 or 10 the next morning. Again I got sleep in the next morning. Tuesday June 9th during the evening I just had some instinct that it might happen. I got the house all cleaned up, the laundry all done. We had our luggages packed a month before my due date, my birth plan was all typed out, me and Josh had our coping techniques all figured out. That night around 12am it of course started again. I decided to jump in the bath cause it was a little worse and I thought the tub would be soothing. It was very relaxing and helped the contractions. I got ready for bed and thats when it all begun. I had intense contractions that started off feeling like menstrual cramps and eventually started to feel like their own thing. Like someone with a knife stabbing you. They were getting closer and closer. I just kept trying to get through it without waking Josh up. At one point it was just so unbearable I had to wake him up and tell him it is really bad. We decided we should head to the hospital cause they seemed close together enough.

We headed to the hospital and our hospital isn’t that far but it felt like forever. When we got there we checked in and instead of getting a wheel chair I thought I should just walk cause that helps the labor progress better and it totally did. When I finally got to the room it was getting so bad. I changed into my gown that I bought, totally cute. At that point they came in and checked how far along I was. One of the nurses was absolutely horrible. She was checking me while I was having a contraction and it was the worst pain I have ever felt. I wanted to punch her. Me and Josh were planning to go as long as we could without medicine cause I have a good tolerance for pain but that sure did change once I ended up having some problems. After that the contractions were completely unbearable but I was so confused on why they hurt so bad already and for some reason my contractions were not coming and going. At one point it was just hurting forever which made it so much harder. I learned in the labor classes that they should come for a few seconds at first and then go away, and of course as you get closer they stay for a few minutes and then go away. I don’t know why mine didn’t feel like that. At this point I remember waiting for the doctor to come in, I wasn’t in my labor room yet. It felt like forever but Josh said it wasn’t that long we waited. After that I remember getting into our room and then that is where I guess all the craziness happened. I don’t remember much but what I do remember I thought I was dreaming during all this. From what Josh tells me this is where they found out I had preeclampsia. Its a pregnancy condition where basically the only cure is to get the baby out. It makes your blood pressure rise and can also affect the baby. I guess they ended up giving me some crazy medicine to help me not feel the pain, not an epidural yet. It was to help control my blood pressure cause it was starting to sky rocket. Josh said they had the narcotics doctor in there trying to figure something out. I don’t remember him. I guess they would give me something but then Nyla’s blood pressure would start going high so they had to try something different but then mine would change so I guess that happened for a while where they couldn’t figure out what to give me. I had so much medicine that I was completely knocked out. I think eventually they gave me an epidural which I don’t remember. Josh said he had to help hold me up cause I kept falling over. I remember waking up at one point and I felt the pain again so they gave me more medicine.

I remember waking up again and my back was cramping up. I could not get comfortable, it was so annoying so they gave me more medicine.  I remember waking up one time and asking Josh for Nyla’s blanket she was gonna use and her outfit cause I wanted them to use the blanket I brought.

Josh told me that towards the beginning when they gave me the crazy medicine that I tried to eat something, I think it was a nutrigrain bar Josh brought for me and then I ended up throwing up all over myself. I was totally out of it so I guess the nurses had to change and clean me up. I was bummed to know that I wasn’t wearing the cute hospital gown I bought :( I kinda remember glimpes of this happening.

I remember the main doctor coming in and saying that we might need to do a c section cause the labor wasn’t progressing quick enough and my blood pressure was getting too high ton continue. Me and Josh of course said we really didn’t want a c section, if we could wait as long as we could before resulting to that. We did and it seemed like we were able to try naturally. I remember when they said it was almost time to start pushing. Once that all started I remember looking up and seeing a whole mess of people in my room surrounding me and non of it was family or friends, just Josh but I didn’t notice him. It was tons of doctors for me and pediatricians for Nyla in case something went wrong cause we were having some issues. I was still completely numb which was nice cause I couldn’t feel anything. It was nice but could also be a problem when pushing cause I couldn’t feel how to push very well. Josh said during the pushing I was so out of it that I would start sleeping and they would say ok time to push and I would get up and push and then go back to sleep. At one point the main doctor said that we may need to suction or clamp the baby out. I really didn’t want that, she gave me a couple more pushes and I guess I started pushing really good. I think a few more pushes and she was almost out. I remember feeling her head before she was all the way out. I remember very clearly when they let me see her when she came out. That moment will never leave my mind. I was still out of it so I don’t remember much.

She was born June 10th at 5:53pm. She was 6 lb. 2 oz. Oh by the way I did not tear or need an opisiotomy. My midwife was amazing! I remember waiting for the placenta to come out and I asked the doctor and she said it already came out, ya totally out of it. After all that I remember them giving her a bath and after that when they took her out to dry her off I guess she started getting all pale and started turning blue. I guess she was holding her breathe or just not breathing. All the nurses her panicking and Josh too. Good thing I was all hoped up on drugs cause I wasn’t panicked. I don’t really remember what was going on. To me it was all a dream so I wasn’t worried. She finally was back to breathing but she had to be hooked up to a monitor to show her breathing.

I remember my doctor asking me what I wanted to eat cause she was gonna get some food ordered for me cause I haven’t eaten in a long time. I was still out of it so I really couldn’t let her know what I wanted. So she just ordered me a tons of different stuff.  When the food came I tried eating and drinking but I remember I started to feel sick and then threw up my food and drink. So they said I could only barely get sips of drink. But I think I still snuck in some big gulps cause I forgot they said not to drink much. I remember Ashley coming to visit and I think I started to doze off at one point. It was such a weird feeling to remember everything in a dream that I thought I was having.

Once the drugs started wearing off it all started to feel more real. It was weird realizing it all wasn’t a dream and that I just had my baby. At one point I kept having doctors coming in talking to me and I had no idea who they were but Josh seemed to know them so he would explain to me who they were. I found out that I was hooked up to a catheter which is basically where your urine goes while I was knocked out. Really weird. I couldn’t get out of bed that whole day which was good cause the next day when I could my legs felt so weird. I felt like I had to learn to walk again. My legs were so weak. My medication was pretty much gone the next day and I started to feel the pain.

I was so happy to have my baby but I just wanted to go home. I couldn’t get much sleep cause I kept having doctors coming in every couple hours poking me with a needle and taking my blood pressure. They had to monitor me for a few days to make sure the preeclampsia was gone. They mentioned that my kidneys and liver were failing during the pregnancy so they had to watch that too. That was kinda scary to hear. Then we were also worried about Nyla and her breathing cause they mentioned that if it wasn’t getting better that they would have to take her to another hospital for further testing. Not what you want to hear, so me and Josh were kinda paranoid with her breathing.

On a brighter note the hospitals room service was so delicious. That was my favorite part of staying there, but I was starting to break down after a couple days. I just wanted to be in my bed with no one disturbing me and poking me so many times that my whole arm was completely blue and black. We had no idea when we were gonna get released. Both me and Nyla had to be ok for us to leave. We were released Saturday June 13th and were finally able to go home….

Happy 1st birthday my little Princess!! With many more special birthdays to come….